One Degree of Separation

(I originally wrote this as an email to one of my cousins to describe the week of hell that my hometown has just endured.)

It has been a surreal week for us.  This is my written account of how it all went down for us (me and Vladi mostly)  It helps me process if I can put my experiences and feelings down on paper.

       The week started ordinarily enough. On Monday I studied and filled out my sample ballot in anticipation of voting on Tuesday. Then I began writing an account of the adventures we had in October, which was very eventful month for us and which I wanted to write about while it was fresh in my mind.

       Tuesday, we ate breakfast and walked down the block to our polling place, which we were gratified to see was humming with activity. I have never seen all the voting booths filled during a mid-term election. We completed our civic duty and took a selfie.

It was a beautiful day and we anticipated nothing more than to follow the election results. Most of the proposition results went the way we voted and I think all the people that we voted for won their races.

Wednesday 11/7, we had made plans to have dinner with our friends, Ralph and Janeen, whom we hadn’t had a chance to celebrate Vladi’s birthday with before that. We went to a restaurant called Lazy Dog which had just expanded its outdoor patio and was very pretty, with a beautiful tree wrapped in twinkling white lights, along with strings of pretty lights overhead and plenty of outdoor heaters to ward off the cool fall evening. Lazy Dog is located in what’s known as the Oaks Mall, which is just on the other side of the freeway and about three blocks down from where the Borderline Bar and Grill is located.

       After we had a nice dinner, we went back to our house to have dessert and play a couple of games. We decided to cut off the fun at 12:00 because Janeen had to get up early to work. So, we said our goodbyes and I did a little cleaning up before heading to bed. No sooner had I turned my lights off than Vladi came in to tell me he had gotten a news alert that a shooting had taken place at the Borderline. A few minutes later, Janeen called to tell me that on their drive home, they heard sirens and helicopters responding en masse to some huge event. We were all shaken to the core, first accounting in our heads for our own kids (Christy and Sammy both safely asleep at home) and then thinking about all the other people we know that could have been there. One of the girls I used to work with had talked about her daughter going there all the time (I found out later that her daughter was not there that night but her boyfriend was working as bartender-he was able to get away and hide in the attic). And in the subsequent days I realized how many of the other twenty- and thirty-somethings I know, had spent time there. Christy’s boyfriend, Brandon, had even gotten a notification of “something you might be interested in” that night, about “college night at Borderline”. It was chilling to think about how close they came to being there. We were all sending messages back and forth to check on people we were concerned about and we were all dreading the revelation of the list of names of the people who were killed.

       The next day, when we found out there was a blood drive going on, we all wanted to go, but before we even got out the door, we got messages that there were already hundreds of people in line and people were being turned away unless they had type 0 negative blood. So, we turned on the TV and sat glued to the news reports. A lot of the injured victims as well as the officer who was killed were brought to the hospital (where Christy was born) 2 blocks from us. Unfortunately, we found out too late about the procession for the slain officer when they carried his body from the hospital to the coroner’s office. But many people turned out to pay their respects, including Brandon (Christy’s boyfriend). We watched it on TV. We sat stunned and mesmerized as new details were reported from the scene of the massacre. None of us knew directly anyone that was killed or hurt, but we all know of someone who knows someone. I guess that’s one degree of separation. And even though it would be even worse to have no degree of separation, our hearts are all grieving for those that were there and their families. It is just gut-wrenching.

       And before we even had a chance to fully process this event, as we were watching the news and listening to the Santa Ana winds blowing wildly outside, at a little past 2pm on Thursday, reports and film of a fire started coming in. The first one started near a water treatment facility in Newbury Park, which is just a couple of miles from us. It was blowing north and west (away from us) but it grew so rapidly it was incredible. It took an eerily similar path to a fire we had 5 years ago that burned from almost the same location all the way to the Pacific Ocean. Over the next couple of days, this one did the same.

       Not long after the first fire started, there were reports of another one, this time to our south. Both of them caused massive evacuations and because of the wind were too unpredictable for the firefighters to get any kind of handle on.

 Throughout that day and the next we kept seeing huge plumes of smoke in different places all around us. One would seem to die down and then we’d see another one shoot up in another spot. A lot of our friends in surrounding neighborhoods had to leave their homes until the authorities determined it was safe for them to return. Again, I don’t directly know anyone who lost their home, but I know several people who know someone who did.

       The place where Christy works has been closed for a few days and she doesn’t even know exactly how close the fire came. Also, the Taco Bell where Sammy works is in the city of Calabasas, which is under evacuation orders. He went to see what it looked like and said that all the vegetation around it got burned. The building is standing but the power is shut off, so it is closed for now, too.

       Saturday, the wind calmed down so the smoke settled over the whole area. It was eerie and unpleasant. But it gave the exhausted firefighters a chance to gain a small amount of control over the fire.

       Sunday, the wind picked up again. As firefighters from all our neighboring states have rushed in to help out they’ve been able to address the spot fires that keep popping up all over the area and get them contained before they can get out of control.

       Even though the wind is still blowing, the sky looks clear and blue around us today, Tuesday, 11/13.

       As we venture out and drive just a mile or so in almost any direction, we see evidence of the fire’s destruction. I feel lucky to be one of the ones that suffered no personal loss (other than my sense of safety). But as I hear stories from people who know people who have either lost a loved one or know someone who was hurt or even present in the shooting, or someone who has lost their home, it makes my heart heavy with sadness. Our little town seems to have become a household name this week. No longer will we have to say, “I live in Thousand Oaks—about 30 miles north of Los Angeles.” People will know exactly where we are talking about.